By: Ann Watters
In November of 2016 a friend of mine was diagnosed with Cancer and on hearing the news a shock wave went through me. As for her response, it was both unreal and scary. Determined to heal this issue, she said she would not have chemical, radiation or any other bone biopsies. She had a type of blood cancer in the chronic stage.
I went to work, researching all the possible healing herbs, food, supplements, homeopathic remedies, plus exercise, rest, machines to raise vibrations and Polarity sessions beneficial to heal this dysfunctional energetic system. I was working on this day and night with dread in my mind as I contemplated the death and loss of my friend. I realized that meditation was the only real support I had to stay positive and I was determined to find the answers to her energetic imbalance. I began finding some very good solutions for her and as I was doing this, I was finding some very good solutions to the issue of my own mental dread at the possibility of losing the best friend on Earth that I have ever had except for my true friend, my soul within and my Spiritual Master.
So many years meditating, so many visits to see my beautiful teacher in India, the mediator between my soul and the Lord within me and yet I was still faltering…frightened and faithless. There is a wonderful positivity in failure that can only be experienced through being a caregiver and feeling powerless most of the time. The cure is in knowing that one’s time on this Earth is not in our hands. Destiny guides the soul of the person who is ill as well as the person who is caregiving. Balance is a constant that cannot be ignored, or the caregiver loses equipoise and becomes both frustrated and angry and has no patience to go on with the effort that it takes to support the person in need.
One has to daily keep the discipline of muscle testing all food, herbs, supplements, homeopathics, as well as the Doctors to see, the exercise to do daily, the sleep that is needed – the schedule that must be kept. The series of stages that have to be met in the healing of the disease are very numerous and can be deeply scary. My friend has lost 110 pounds in 2 years and 3 months. This was needed. But now the body is recovering and has to create new healthy cell tissue, new muscles. All the unhealthy fat is gone. An entire transformation physically has been observed by myself as well as by my friend. It has been amazing to watch and partake in this process. A caregiver becomes a patient, selfless doer in the process of tending to the person and is themselves fully alive in the person’s healing process and in that process the caregiver heals. A caregiver learns to let go of all expectations, live one minute at a time, be flexible and able to change in an instant. They become attentive to the details that the person shows you through sharing, actions, moods, mental attitudes, emotions and bodily needs. Food changes daily, pain comes and goes, fears come and go and all the while the caregiver needs to stay steady and focused on the person and what they need and, if at all possible, the instant they need it and to do so 24 hours day 7 days a week as required. A mother with a newborn child is a good example of the kind of care that one must give.
Caregiving, to be truly successful, is a search for divine love within one’s self. The caregiver cannot do the job at hand without faith in the God that created the soul of the person being cared for and their own soul. This faith carries the day and the energy is there to cheerfully do this act of service.
Commitment to Life and Love and devoted Service to God, yes I have to use the word God, the God within as the only way one gets thrust into wholeness with the acceptance of life and death as being equal and that death can actually be a joyful event. One has to surrender to LIVE and to accept the way given and shown to you within. ‘Let Go and Let God’ was a big saying in the 1960’s that I was part of, in its fullness in San Francisco, and it is only now that this expression is making any real deep sense to me. Serious illness is one of the greatest positive teachers of how to live life that I have ever experienced. It is a unique opportunity to experience the growth of Faith and Love and I am very grateful for this service. As a Polarity student and teacher this is a peak time in my life. A pinnacle in which spiritual opportunities abound. I bow before The Light that guides me onward. I hope these reflections help all who are struggling with grief and sorrow over the potential or actual loss of a loved one as well as any who offer care. My friend is still here for as long as is permitted and that is okay with me now, as well as with her. Seize the day!
Ann Watters BCPP RPE
Polarity Center of Salem